Lote chip ingram8/10/2023 God has wired you for intimacy – to love and be loved in a relationship that lasts forever. This week we will begin “Broken Hearts, Broken Dreams” on Living on the Edge radio and online. Postponement for the infatuated is intolerable.ĭid you have more “L”s for Love or “I”s for Infatuation when you totaled it up? An infatuated couple tends to feel an urge to get married – instantly. Test of Delayed Gratification – A couple in genuine love in not indifferent to the timing of their wedding, but they do not feel an irresistible drive toward it. Infatuation may change suddenly and unpredictably.ġ2. Test of Stability – Love tends to endure. In infatuation affection is expressed earlier, sometimes at the very beginning.ġ1. Test of Affection – In love affection is expressed later in the relationship, involving the external expression of the physical attraction we just described. These tend to express what they feel toward each other.)ġ0. Couples often communicate volumes through looks. In contrast, when couples who are in genuine love have any physical contact, it tends to have special meaning as well as pleasure. If your heart doesn’t skip a beat now and then and you don’t feel real attraction for your mate or the person you plan to marry, I’d call that a problem. (Now don’t read “small part” as “not a part” in what I just stated. Test of Physical Attraction – Physical attraction is a relatively small part of love, but it is a central focus of infatuation. Infatuation imagines love to be intense closeness, 24/7, all the time.ĩ. Test of Distance – Love knows the importance of distance. Infatuated people tend to disregard or try to ignore problems.Ĩ. Test of Problem Solving – A couple in love faces problems frankly and tries to solve them. By contrast, an infatuated person loses his or her ambition, appetite, and interests in everyday affairs.ħ. Test of Work – An individual in love works for the other person for his or her mutual benefit. An infatuated individual seems to have a blind sense of security.Ħ. Test of Security – Genuine love requires and fosters a sense of security and feelings of trust. An infatuated individual may be “in love” with two or more persons simultaneously.ĥ. Test of Singularity – Genuine love is focused on only one person. Test of Focus – Genuine love is other-person centered. Infatuation may grow out of an acquaintance with only one of these characteristics known about the other person.ģ. Test of Knowledge – Love grows out of an appraisal of all the known characteristics of the other person. Test of Time – Love benefits and grows through time infatuate ebbs and diminishes with time.Ģ. For those married folks out there, unless you understand the radical difference between love and infatuation, you may set yourself up for devastation in your future years of marriage skewed expectations may be robbing you of a rich, warm, and deep relationship. Not only that, if you are unclear about the difference, you may find yourself getting unintentionally connected to a member of the opposite sex who is not your spouse, naively concluding that you’ve now found “true love.”Īre you ready to take the test? Read the differences and for each test make a mental note of “L” for Love and “I” for Infatuation as you apply them to a current or past relationship.ġ. These tests aren’t just for single people, though they will help anyone who is not in a significant relationship learn what kind of person to pursue and whom to avoid. To get you started, I have provided twelve tests that will help you understand if you are in love or if, in fact, you are experiencing what relational experts call infatuation. But is it really love? How do you know whether what I just described is the beginning of the greatest relationship you will ever experience on earth or simply another episode of infatuation? No doubt we all agree that those are thrilling moments, especially if we sense a similar response from the other person. On your way home you call up your friend – “I think I’m in love!” If you’re lucky and don’t stutter you’ll be able to exchange a few words. She gives a little smirk and you smile back. “I’m in love, I’m in love, and I don’t care who knows it!!” Over the holidays Buddy the Elf comically reminded me just how much we as humans love to be in love.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply.AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |